My Fiancé (tries to) Describe My Makeup
I saw this tag on the wonderful Ashlexyz blog and found it hilarious so I decided to do it with Chris – my fiancé who is absolutely clueless when it comes to makeup. This was so much fun, I love watching men squirm. I actually found this highly amusing, I need to do posts like this more. Warning – may contain the occasional swear word (I feel like a badass writing swear words on my blog – what a rebel!). Well, here goes…
So babe, how much do you know about makeup?
*Sarcastic voice* “A lot. Well I don’t know much really, apart from you put it on your face”
Have you ever bought a makeup item for me that you had no idea what it was for?
I once bought a brush from MAC and it was like a face brush, not a hairbrush. What are those things called, is it a brush? I don’t know, it was so big I didn’t think you could even use it on your face. I just bought what the makeup lady told me was good.
I love how he’s double guessing everything from the look on my face. He was probably the easiest sell ever ?
Name something you’ve bought me.
Well that MAC brush, it was number 7 something, something …
Are you just saying 7 because it’s your lucky number?
No, I’ve just got 7 in my head. Is it max factor 7?
Moving on…
OK, now I want you to describe the following makeup items.
Concealer
Something that conceals your face. A runny, liquid thing that you put on your face. I think you can use concealer or powder to cover your spots.
Mascara
It’s to make your eyelashes pop like sparkles
Like sparkles? Lol, what.
Foundation
It’s makeup, it’ll make you look pretty…
Lipstick
In the olden days, lipstick was actually only worn by women with special talents *whispers to me* it meant you were good at bj’s. That’s a well-known fact about lipstick, I can tell you that!
Of course, he would know that! Typical boy knowledge.
Lipgloss
It gives you that sh*t Kylie Jenner has. Does it not make your lips swell up? Actually, does it not make your lips shine as well. Is that lip gloss or lip balm that make your lips swell?
Lip liner
To be honest, I don’t have clue what that is. But what it sounds like to me is something you would use to outline or define the edges of your lips.
Eyeshadow
Well, that’s self-explanatory it puts the shadows in your eyes. *Looks at me bewildered* I don’t know what you’re laughing at – it makes your eyes darker. It gives you the smokey eye effect.
Self-explanatory, is it really?
Bronzer
Is that the stuff that makes your cheeks look bronze? It’s like why would you want to make your cheeks bronze in the first place? I think it sparkles. Let’s go with cheek definition I feel confident with that answer.
He loves that word sparkle, doesn’t he?
Highlight
What… A highlighter? Highlights things on your face?
Are you actually just explaining to me what a highlighter pen does?
Yeah well, it highlights things does it not?
Contour
You’re making shit up *stares at me with beady eyes*. I don’t believe that exists – you’re trying to trick me!
Brow gel
Is it like hair gel but for your eyebrows? So if your eyebrows are sticking out and you want to stick them back down. Why would you not just give them a trim?
Sticking out?
Primer
*Laughs out loud* like Primark? I’ll go with what I know. Optimus Prime is the leader of The Transformers so he’s the prime, number one guy. So it must be the most important thing to girls.
Great logic ??
Bb cream
Kumba, I’m lost in the wind here. I don’t know what that means or what the hell you would use that for. What does BB stand for?
Blemish balm
Awwwwwww it’s to cover your blemishes.
Micellar water
Is it makeup remover? I know you use that.
Eyeliner
Draws lines around your eyes? Defines them?
Blush
You mean blusher? It makes your cheeks rosy.
I love how he actually just corrected me
Strobing
What? You’re saying that as if its a normal thing. No. I don’t know what that means. I can only think of strobe lights. I give up.
Was this test hard?
Harder than my uni dissertation
Do you think you could apply makeup like me?
*Sarcastically* with my eyes closed
Haha well, that was interesting! I would probably give him 60% he did much better than I thought he would actually. This was such a great blog tag if you decide to join in don’t forget to leave your link in the comments so I can have a chuckle!
I laughed so much at this! Brilliant, especially the mascara popping like sparkles ?
This is a fantastic post, it’s funny to see how clueless guys can be about make up x
“Foundation…it makes you look pretty” hahaha, thanks. This was such a funny post! It’s nice to see this kind of post, rather than it always being made into YouTube videos! 🙂
Kayleigh x
scampinchips.co.uk
That was fabulous, made me laugh out. I fear my husband would be much much worse.
This was hilarious! I’m dying at his answer for lipstick haha!
Nicole | The Glam Surge // Enter My Giveaway!
Well he got the basic part when he said “Well I don’t know much really, apart from you put it on your face” right x
Ha I love these posts, it’s hilarious how much our other halves kind of absorb from us really isn’t it?
ha ha ha love this I suppose we don’t think twice about it and I can out my face on multi-tasking these days and the girls all know what each product does to be fair the teens know more about these items than me thanks to YouTube but men no I guess they don’t really have a clue although he didn’t do too bad
hahaha.. this is a lovely post.. I kept imagining what would be my hubbys answers to all of them… I don’t think he would score above 30 :).. I must give it a shot to check
What a great post and so much fun to read! I could just imagine a man looking at my collection like ‘eh?’ haha.
I loved reading every bit of this! It was so funny ! x
Bwahahaaa I like your fella, He got into the spirit and he knows his ladies stuff TBH I would have given him a 75% BB indeed you are lucky he didnt say the otehr one 😀
I’m so glad you did this tag! I enjoyed doing mine, and love reading them. Absolutely hilarious answers given here – your fella really does love the sparkles ?
XO
Ashley
“It puts shadows on your eyes” slayed me, haha! I wonder how my boyfriend would get along doing this! Also snorted at “I’m lost in the wind here”, bless!
Ada x
adalovelacex.co.uk